As we sat sipping coconut broth mixed with rice, I looked up and noticed three couples enter the restaurant, waiting for the hostess to return from the kitchen to seat them.
I'm a naturally observant person, and I tend to stare at people without really caring if it makes them uncomfortable.
"Oh, the Hot Guy will Twitter pics of his penis to college girls! (Although if someone robbed me, I'd be pissed; my high-end discounted shoe and handbag collection took a long time to put together.) The thing is, has the potential for lewd, crude, and dishonest behavior. But no one writes about them because they're so ugly. And just then, somewhere between choking on a shrimp tail and my fourteenth cosmopolitan, I spotted my former life: a Beauty and her Beast. Not because I'd never seen a beast so ugly or a beauty so beautiful (I mean come on), but because I saw their future flash right before my eyes; a future I know all too well: an ominous dinner invitation to Tio Pepe's...
I might be alone in this, but I don't think any of that is all that bad. Although the wedding did force me into thinking about my dating past and witness everyone else's choices, I found myself happily gnawing on cocktail hour, waiting for Hot to arrive. there he will decide that stalking her is a good idea but not consider it stalking.
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And generally, it's presumed that the beautiful Amazons among us (the eights, nines, and 10s) should only date each other -- while the "uglies" of the bunch (the twos, threes, and fours) must stick to their own Quasimodo kind.
But, every now and then, a couple pulls the switch off this genetic equilibrium.
But after spending most of my twenties lost in rolls of fat, suffocated by stinky ugly man farts and the resentment that often builds between the Pretty and the Ugly, I've decided that being a selfless humanitarian is just overrated.
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I've welcomed men into my bed who were short, fat, or balding (sometimes all three), while I, thankfully, am none of those things.
Despite those relationships not working out in the long run, they did end up being some of the most rewarding dating experiences I've had.